I am currently working on Step 11 out of 12 and I am determined to see this process through, even though I'm not sure if it was the right choice for me.
I began my downward spiral in July or August, and I can't shake it... about the time I began CoDA and now I'm seriously questioning if it has done more harm than good. I joined it to heal, but it has opened up old injuries and guilt and I find myself sinking lower while feeling totally alone and cut off from the world.
Counseling has never helped, but I'm considering buying some St. John's Wort. I hate feeling like this, and it frustrates me that after 4-5 years I have declined once again. Makes me want to bang my head against the wall... I am so frustrated and disgusted with myself.